Showing posts with label self-esteem & low confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-esteem & low confidence. Show all posts

Friday, 5 June 2015

Inspiring Interview with blogger, Florence Grace: Low self-esteem & confidence!


Hi everyone!

Now that my university life is over, I'm back working as hard as ever on my Take Back What's Yours Campaign. Over the last few months, I've been in complete awe at how many people have gotten involved and taken the time to spread the word about it. It honestly means so much and I'm forever grateful to you all!

To kick things off again, I've got a great interview here with fellow blogger, Florence from the blog 'Love from, Florence Grace'. I hope you all enjoy this interview as much as I did... I'm sure you'll all find it inspiring and will help any of you who are going through body confidence/self-esteem issues.

Hi Florence, tell me a bit about yourself!


Hi! I'm a student, studying Creative Business, I work part time at a charity shop and I am a radio presenter, columnist and blogging extraordinaire! I'm a very busy bee and am working hard to create a media-based career for myself. 

What do you blog about?


I blog mostly about 'lifestyle'-esque topics, usually current issues with a spin of my own opinion...I am a very opinionated person and I am not afraid to speak my mind. Sometimes it gets me caught up in some debates, but that's all part of the fun of being a writer! 

What inspires you in life?


In life, I inspire myself! It may sound big headed or vain, but I have overcome so many obstacles in my life to get to where I am right now, and I have achieved so many things in the last year that about four years ago I never would have even dreamed about doing! I'm also inspired by Vanessa Sanyauke, founder of Girls Talk London, who strives to work hard for and represent women of all ages from all over the world. 

What keeps you motivated?


My blog keeps me motivated! Every time I see my views go up or receive a nice message about my posts, I feel happy that people are actually reading my posts and that it makes all the time spent working on my blog seem worthwhile...this motivates me to write more and to improve my writing as one day, I want to be a voice for people worldwide!

What is your proudest achievement either in life or the blogging world?


My proudest achievement is finally gaining independence at the age of 18. I was always so co-dependent on my friends or my boyfriend and then one day, something just clicked and I started to do all these exciting things by myself! I started travelling to media events at London, alone, doing courses, alone, and of course branching out into a brand new world of blogging completely new to everything and everyone! Gaining independence has been a massive confidence boost and I'm so happy it happened for me. 

What is your experience with low confidence and self-esteem?


I suffered very badly at the hands of online bullies for 4 years of my life during secondary school. I was mocked for absolutely anything and everything I did, given endless abuse and lost all of my friends for doing nothing- or nothing that I was ever aware of anyway! 

How has it changed and impacted your life?


Being bullied completely destroyed my self-esteem, and to this day I am still an incredibly self-conscious person- from my looks, to my weight, to feeling like I'm always being stared at by people and laughed at. It was a very bad time for me and unfortunately still has an impact on me today. I hope one day this will change. 

When did you realise your low confidence and self-esteem was impacting your life and how did you feel about it? Was there a trigger that set it off?


I realised it was impacting my life when I was about 17 and my boyfriend noticed I was increasingly more and more sad and keeping myself to myself. My parents then went through a divorce around this time, so I think this probably made everything feel that much worse. I could feel myself getting sadder, but felt I could do nothing about it, which only made me feel worse! 

What happens when you're feeling at your lowest? Is there anything you do to make you feel a bit better?


When I'm at my lowest I comfort eat and I cry. Both of these are incredibly bad for me, especially when I am already very self-conscious about my weight, and as for the crying, well, it just leaves me with a pounding headache! Usually to feel better I will get in my pj's and watch a good film, or if I can, I will see my boyfriend, who has been with me through highs and lows for almost 5 years and usually knows how to make me feel a bit better. It's important to remember to breathe deeply and remember that it's not the end of the world, just a small rut. I have to frequently remind myself of this! 

How are you coping with it? 


I'm coping much better now! Whilst I am still a very self-conscious person, I am much happier in myself compared to me about a year and a half ago! 

What kind of support did you seek or did you keep it to yourself?


I just had support from my close friends and family. Fortunately, my problems were nothing serious, and I think it was just a lot of bad things happening all at once, on top of the bullying. Like I said, when I feel bad, I tend to comfort eat and this made my weight problems worse! The Take Back What's Yours campaign is hopefully going to change that around!

Thank you, I hope so too! Do you feel like the media is doing enough to help people who suffer from low self-esteem?


No. Definitely not. It’s definitely one of my pet hates when a magazine splashes a size 6 (or smaller) celebrity female on the front of a magazine with the title "So and so feels comfortable in her body...and tells you how you can to" or words to that effect. Of course you feel comfortable, you're tiny and made up every day by professionals! I think we need a more realistic and serious approach to the issue of low self-esteem. It may not always be something seen as a serious problem, but it can be tough to deal with. 

What are your top tips for anyone living with low self-esteem?


Put up little messages with positive, sunny quotes on for you to find in random places, such as in your sock drawer, on your mirror, next to your toothbrush.

Remind yourself of all the great things about you- keep these written down in a list if it helps! 

TALK to someone. Even if it's only your cat, or your stuffed bear. Sometimes you just need to let it all out! 




I just want to say thank you to Florence for getting involved with Take Back What's Yours! I know your honesty and openness will help people understand they aren't alone in what they are going through. If you want to check out Florence's blog, you can here.


If you're interested in the Take Back What's Yours campaign, there are so many ways to get involved!

If you want to take part in the Take Back What's Yours Challenge, head over to the website here!


If you'd like to be interviewed on topics such as Chichi's or anxiety, bullying, health issues or anything at all you feel could be inspiring to readers, send me an email and I'll get back to you ASAP! 

Get in touch! 



Email: ChloesConcept@gmail.com / TakeBackWhatsYours@gmail.com




Chloe x

Tuesday, 14 April 2015

Take Back What's Yours Interview with Chichi - Low Self-esteem & Confidence!

Low self-esteem and confidence

Hey everyone! 

So, everyone seemed to really like the Take Back What's Yours interviews on the blog but I haven't posted one recently! I've got so many already conducted and in my drafts ready to post so I'm happy to say they're back and I know everyone who is going through some of the topics discussed will really find them helpful, motivational and inspiring so I cannot wait to post them all!

Today's interview is with Chichi who has an amazing blog which covers a whole range of topics from fashion and beauty, to travel and lifestyle! I've included her links at the bottom so please say hi to her and check out her links! 

Let's get into the interview!


Hi Chichi, tell me a bit about yourself!

I am 22 years old, I'm from London and I am a full-time university student. In my spare time I write for a few blogs and online magazines, and I run my own blog.


What do you blog about?

My blog is called Trends, Style & Features (I'm in the process of changing the name to Trends, Comment & Style.)  It's about fashion, lifestyle and beauty trends.  I am trying to branch out into posting about other topics, such as my opinions and comments on current affairs, society and politics.


What inspires you in life?

I feel inspired by people who have been able to achieve all the things they wanted to achieve in life, and I feel inspired by people – friends, bloggers, actresses, singers, authors, etc – who have overcome adversity and are now able to achieve what they want.  If shows me that regardless of whatever one's been through in life, you can overcome it and go on to live a great life and (realistically) achieve what you want.


What keeps you motivated?

My goals and ambitions.  From a young age I've always had goals and ambitions and these keep me motivated and keep me going.  I tend to throw myself into things and I work really hard.


What is your proudest achievement either in life or the blogging world?

In life so far, I'd say getting into university despite the obstacles standing in the way and moving away for it.  I feel as though moving away for university had really changed me for the better and has helped to aid me in personal development.  Even though I have had some bad moments I am so glad I came to university. I am enjoying my experience here and I will be so sad when it ends!

In the blogging world, I can't think of anything spectacular!  However I would say I'm so glad I started blogging (I started my blog in November 2013 and now I blog regularly) and having a blog has helped me to create a portfolio and get opportunities in writing for other blogs and magazines.  I hope to gain some more opportunities through my blog.


What is your experience with self-esteem?

From a very young ago I had no self-esteem. As a child I was quite timid and sensitive anyway, but there were certain events in my childhood that occurred and these events had an extremely detrimental effect on myself, my life and my well-being. I was constantly judged, dehumanised and degraded. People would always go out of their way to put me down and make me feel bad about myself. I have even experienced this since moving away to university. Unfortunately when people put you down you start to believe in all the negative stuff. I always felt a massive sense of misery, and I felt as though my whole life would be total doom and gloom. At times I thought I had a bleak future.

I spent my childhood lacking in confidence. I could never feel good about myself. I completely loathed myself. I spent my childhood feel hopeless and worthless. I always felt a sense of learned helplessness, weakness and lack of control. I always felt guilty and full of shame. I had an inferiority complex and I thought I was a massive failure. I thought that if people treated me badly then it was all my fault.

I always had a very negative image of myself and a lot of negative thoughts, and that's pretty much how I lived my life for the first 19-20 years or so.


How has it changed and impacted your life?

At times I found I had self-destructive tendencies. Also, I struggled to be assertive and confident, and this has affected a lot of aspects of my life, such as how I relate to people and completing simple tasks such as answering the phone. Assertiveness was something I had always struggled with (even at university) because even though I believe in sticking up for yourself I realised that a lot of people hated that about me, so sometimes it's 'easier' to be passive and go along with things so you don't 'rock the boat,' but that's not like me because naturally I am a defensive person.

I ended up having little to no self-esteem because of a lot of negative experience in childhood so I find I cannot trust people, I am quite distant sometimes and I don't like to let my guard down because I worry people will make assumptions and try to take advantage.


When did you realise your low self-esteem was impacting your life and how did you feel about it? Was there a trigger that set it off?

There wasn't a particular defining moment, but I always knew that something was not right about myself. I'd have moments where things would build up and build up then I'd explode. I would look at myself in the mirror and I just hated myself. My mind was so full of negative thoughts and these thoughts were having a detrimental impact on my mental and physical health. I couldn't bring myself to feel positive and I'd feel so tearful.

Eventually I realised that things had to change, because I knew that if I didn't deal with this then I would continue to suffer in adulthood and I didn't want that. I wanted my life to change and I wanted to change too. I wanted to start having relatively normal experiences and I wanted to start enjoying life but I knew that I couldn't do that with low self-esteem because it would always continue to be a barrier.


How are you coping with it?

I'm coping a lot better now, especially since I had therapy. My mindset is slowly changing. I am (slowly) building up confidence and assertiveness. I don't hate myself anymore and I don't see myself in a negative way. I feel confident and I feel as though I can hold my own in a situation now. I can now do daily tasks like answering the phone or putting in an order at a coffee shop without feeling bad. I find I speak a lot clearly now and I can make face-to-face contact. I try to think positive now. I feel as though I have found the strength to just be myself.


What kind of support did you seek or did you keep it to yourself?

I've had CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). At times I found it a bit unhelpful (a lot of my issues are deep-rooted) but I learned a few techniques on how to recognise negative thinking patterns and how to counteract them.


Do you feel like the media are doing enough to help people who suffer from low self-esteem?

Not really. I feel as though there is a sense of irony in the media and in society in general – there is a massive expectation for people to have high self-esteem and confidence but I don't see anything in the media about how to have higher self-esteem and confidence.


I also think that societal attitudes need to change. I feel as though assertiveness (especially in women) is often seen as a bad thing. In my experience a lot of people hated the fact that I could stand up for myself and stay true to myself and my beliefs and values. I guess some people prefer passiveness, because it is easier to bring someone down to their lowest ebb if they are passive.  

Even though I have become a lot more assertive, confident and self-assured I still find that people view these traits as a bad thing, even at university, so I think people's mentality need to change, and society needs to change. Having assertiveness, confidence, the ability to stand-up for yourself and the ability to remain self-assured are not negative traits, and these traits don't make a person 'aggressive'. I think that maybe some people don't like these traits because if a person is assertive then it's a lot harder to keep them 'in their place' if that makes sense. I think we live in a culture where we build people up and bring them down and assertiveness and confidence counteract that sort of behaviour.


What are your top tips for anyone living with low self-esteem?

I used to assume that people with high self-esteem were born with it, but it is not something you're born with, it's something you can learn to have. If you struggle with low self-esteem then I suggest having CBT to help deal with this. Also, I've heard that self-help books and online resources are supposed to be really effective too. 

Don't suffer with it, do something about it, because having low self-esteem can really hold you back in life.

Thank you for taking part in this Take Back What's Yours interview, Chichi! I know people who are going through something similar will really appreciate your honesty and advice. I love blogger interviews because it lets readers know they aren't alone or different from feeling a certain way...a lot of people are in the same boat! 

If you'd like to check out Chichi's links, I've included them below!




Chichi's Links


If you're interested in the Take Back What's Yours campaign, there are so many ways to get involved!


If you want to take part in the Take Back What's Yours Challenge, head over to the website here!


If you'd like to be interviewed on topics such as Chichi's or anxiety, bullying, health issues or anything at all you feel could be inspiring to readers, send me an email and I'll get back to you ASAP! 


Get in touch! 



Email: ChloesConcept@gmail.com / TakeBackWhatsYours@gmail.com




Chloe x


Saturday, 4 April 2015

TWITTER CHAT FOR BLOGGERS


Twitter chats for bloggers

Hi everyone! I hope you're all well and enjoying the Easter bank holiday!


This post is all about, as you might've guessed, a new Twitter chat for all bloggers

A few months ago, when introducing the new part of #TakeBackWhatsYours campaign, I decided it would be so much fun to start a new Twitter chat for it. It's another way for us all to connect, chat and share experiences and generally help us all feel great, empowered and motivated which is the main message of my campaign. I've hosted Twitter chats in the past & really enjoyed it, so I thought to myself, why not start one for #TakeBackWhatsYours?

Some topics which will be covered each week are as follows; 
  • Self-esteem and low confidence
  • Setting goals and learning how to achieve them
  • Turning dreams into reality 
  • Taking back your life & gaining control
  • Anxiety
  • Motivation
  • Diabetes & other medical problems
  • Health, fitness & food
  • School/University/Careers
  • Blogging, blog tips, SEO, traffic, engagement, events, working with brands
  • Beauty/fashion/lifestyle/interior/food/travel/books/tv/films

I would love for you to also tweet me topic requests to get us going and for us to have a good few weeks of chat topics lined up so we all know what's going on and what to expect!

The hashtag will be '#TBWY' instead of #TakeBackWhatsYours (for character restrictions) and the Twitter account questions will be asked from @TBWYCampaign

I'm still a little bit unsure of what day to definitely hold the chat because there are quite a few that go on and I want to make sure it fits in best around the other chats! Please tweet me day and time suggestions and I'll decide for sure ASAP - I was thinking possibly a Friday/Saturday/Sunday evening around 9pm! I will update you all as soon as I have set a day for sure so keep an eye on @ChloesConcept, @TBWYCampaign and here because I'll be posting about it on all three!

I love Twitter chats but I want this one to be slightly different. For example, at the beginning of the chat, the first question I might ask could be for you all to tweet a picture of your favourite quote, or of a quote you're loving at the moment. This will be just to kick things off and get everyone feeling hopeful, motivated and inspired! 

If you'd be interested in "tuning in" for this #TBWY chat, please let me know so I know how many would be keen for this and I'll get to work straight away as I'm really excited to get this going!


Get in touch! 



Email: ChloesConcept@gmail.com / TakeBackWhatsYours@gmail.com




Chloe x


Thursday, 8 January 2015

BE PART OF THE BLOGGING MOVEMENT IN 2015 - TAKE BACK WHAT'S YOURS


Hi everyone!

I just wanted to write a post thanking everyone who has taken part in Take Back What's Yours - New Year Challenge so far! Your support has been so overwhelming and amazing, I really can't believe it!

It makes me so incredibly happy to see us bloggers pulling together to write posts for this challenge, something which is one of my main aims of this campaign; for us all to pull together and make a difference...and that is happening!

I love reading through everyone's posts, the comments, emails, tweets...everything! I am so appreciative of the huge amount of support people are showing toward this campaign, so thank you so, so much.

This is just a little post to keep you updated, but coming this weekend is a big post which features everyone's #TakeBackWhatsYours blog post links and photos! I can't wait to share it with you all! I'll keep updating this post every time someone uploads a new post or picture so you'll all be in it!

Please remember that this is not just a regular New Year's resolution that you give up after 5 minutes (like I usually do!). No, this is a lifetime commitment! I'll be doing posts throughout the year with this challenge, focusing on the next part of the campaign which will be posting updates on how you are getting on with your resolutions! More information on that to come in the near future though!

I tag you ALL to get involved with this campaign! If you are unsure about what it entails, you can have a look at this post which tells you everything you need to know about how you can get involved with the big blogging movement in 2015! 

If you aren't a blogger - don't worry! If you have Twitter or Instagram, upload your photo with your poster (more info on this in the post linked above!) and make sure to include  #TakeBackWhatsYours!

I'll be constantly uploading posts with everyone's photos, blog posts and more so keep using this hashtag and also tag me @ChloesConcept on both Twitter and Instagram! 

ALSO before I go, keep an eye on #TakeBackWhatsYours on Twitter for updates! I'm in the process of making a separate Twitter account for this campaign, what do you guys think? Would this be more helpful?

Let's do this!

P.s, this is also my 100th post! 


Love,

Chloe x


Get in touch! 



Email: ChloesConcept@gmail.com / TakeBackWhatsYours@gmail.com


Instagram : @ChloesConcept


Friday, 20 June 2014

My Campaign...explained.

Hi! I'm Chloe, I'm 21 and I live in the UK. I blog about beauty, fashion, lifestyle & interior but my blog has a twist and that's what I will be explaining in this post.

I'm a Media and Communications undergrad student, just starting my final year uni! I study film, journalism, public relations (PR), radio etc., so I have no option but to have been thrown into the “media world” and I really do love it.

The past few months I've been seriously thinking about what I want to do with my degree and whilst I know I love PR and journalism, I want to start putting what I have learnt to good use. In PR I've had to create campaigns for various topics such as health & fitness but a topic which is very important to me is bullying which also includes self-esteem, body confidence and anxiety related issues. My main reason for starting my blog was to provide a platform for people to come visit and feel safe and at home and know they are not alone. 

I feel that the power that the Internet holds is so massive that we cannot even comprehend it so we just go along and accept it but the Internet is hugely used to reinforce negativity in the world and this cannot carry on. The Internet and everything on it is a huge opinion former, where it influences what people believe and what they do.

I want to use the Internet for all the right reasons and reinforce positivity and motivation on my blog and campaign to help people who are going through any of the problems I have mentioned. My blog is a total safe zone. I provide beauty, hair, fashion, interior and lifestyle tips, tricks and reviews so you can have a little look at that if you prefer but you can also be a part of my campaign, whether it is to help yourself or to help others. I will also be including diabetes type 1 into my campaign as I have had this condition for 10 years now and feel that my campaign can also support those who are also going through what I have. 

I understand that you cannot simply stop bullying, anxiety, increase your body confidence and self-esteem. It isn't that easy, I get it - but what you CAN do is change the way it impacts people and help them to block the negativity and problems that is making people feel negative about themselves. I really can't make it clear enough: YOU control YOU.

A little motto I use in my campaign is “TAKE BACK WHAT'S YOURS” and by this I mean, whatever anyone else has taken away from you, whether it's your self-esteem, happiness, positivity, motivation and so on, NOW is the time to take back what belongs to you and keep it forever!

My blog/campaign is a project which excites me as I don't plan to stop until everyone knows about it and passes it along to whoever they think may need it! I've already conducted many interviews on my blog and in-depth blogger profiles where each blogger is totally honest and inspiring in what they say!

I have huge plans for this and I'd love everyone to know about it and get involved so we can put an end to letting negativity take away what belongs to us... whether that negativity comes in the form of a bully, a doubt in your mind, a past experience or anything that is taking away your right to be happy and motivated.


If you want to talk about anything, whether it be just chatting about your day, venting about something that's going on in your life right now or if you need advice or someone to listen, I'm always, always available and you can be sure it will go no further than me. That is the reason I have created this platform as I know it's not easy to confide in people.
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I hope you guys will come back to my blog again let me know you've dropped by!

My links are:

Twitter: @ChloesConcept
Email: ChloesConcept@gmail.com

Chloe x